


the star has left his eyes.

by oomigiris



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt, M/M, Pain, Pro Volleyball Player Bokuto Koutarou, Sad Ending, Star - Freeform, morning sun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:28:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27617671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oomigiris/pseuds/oomigiris
Summary: Each morning, Akaashi springs out of bed with a jolt, smiling as he gazes over the city gleaming with his favorite morning blaze. Keiji tries to forget when it started, but through its luminous and blinding light -- he finds his comfort.He tries to forget when it started, but he knows why. Up to this day, he knows exactly why.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji & Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	the star has left his eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> hello! this is my first time writing a bkak fic <3 i hope u like it !

_ The night ends as the sun finally finds its place over the horizon, its golden shaft seeping through Akaashi’s curtains striking directly at his sight. The sunlight is so bright that he had to narrow his gaze to a squint. He sprang out of bed with a jolt, smiling as he gazes over the city gleaming with his favorite morning blaze. Keiji tries to forget when it started, but through its luminous and blinding light, he finds his comfort. The sun, a morning star, started off as something he despises. It’s something he used to curse off for waking him up too early for his liking. Keiji tries to forget the day he decided to adore its offensive brightness, but he knows why. Up to this day, he knows exactly why. _

One spring night, with his heavy footsteps complementing his emotions, he sighs. The older notices and he looks at him ever so dearly that his heart almost jumps. 

“What’s wrong, Akaashi?” He asks, emphasizing the second syllable of his surname. This has become Bokuto’s habit when he’s about to complain about his day, or when he just wants to coddle the other, much like a baby to be taken care of. He rarely ever does it for the latter, though. The energy bunny disappears when alone with Keiji, and Bokuto himself wonders. When there’s no one around the two, Koutaro becomes timid and gentle —  _ too  _ gentle, even. He wonders. For Bokuto, to say that the reason he’s ever been like this is because Keiji is intimidating is a grave crime. It’s not like that. Maybe it has something to do with how he looks at him with nothing but pure adoration. There’s something about it no one can point out; something so endearing that when he’s near him he subconsciously does everything with extra caution. Maybe it’s because when he’s with Akaashi, everything suddenly turns peaceful. Having a moment alone with him is like finally having a grasp of tranquility, and he would rather keep it than break it. Although tonight, he chooses to cheer the delicate one up. 

Akaashi stops, gazing at the older with tears threatening to spill.  _ How can he look at me like this when I ruined his shot? How can he still call me with pure affection when I was the reason we lost?  _

“Keiji,” Bokuto calls, his arms enclosing the younger in a hug, “You’re the only setter I would ever ask for,” he whispers as tears escape Akaashi’s eyes rushing down his cheeks, burying his face in the other’s chest. As Bokuto’s shirt dampens with tears, he adds, “Don’t ever blame yourself for our loss. If anything, you should be proud of yourself. If it weren’t for your tosses, we wouldn’t have been able to play in the center court.” Akaashi wails, repeatedly saying he’s sorry. 

“Shh, now, ‘Kaashi, I’ve got something important to say,” his fingers holding the younger’s chin, gently lifting it up to face him. “Have I ever told you that you’re my sun?” 

Akaashi wipes his tears, confusion evident on his face. Bokuto silently prays this would cheer the other up, “I remember you telling me that I am your  _ star. _ ” His eyes filled with such joy as he reminisces the day Keiji told him he’s accepting Bokuto’s love, the day Keiji told him he’s the star, the one shining on top of everyone and the one who kept him going forward, the day they became boyfriends. 

“Yeah, and that hasn’t changed.” Akaashi answers, pulling Bokuto for another hug before taking the vacant swing on the playground on their way home. Bokuto takes the swing beside him, “If I am your star, then you are my sun.” 

“I may be someone you look up to, or someone you think who shines bright with the others, but you are someone I look forward to each day. You can just stand there, alone, and yet you’re able to light up my whole life. Your light isn’t just for you; it illuminates everyone around you, Akaashi. For you, I am someone who gleams at the top. For me, you are someone who fills every bit of me with happiness. Please keep on blazing, Keiji. Your warmth is all I ever need in this world.” 

The owl-haired boy cranes his head to see if Akaashi,  _ his  _ sun, has finally smiled. His cheering up tactic may have not been effective since the younger goes back to crying. Nose a little red, and his cheeks feeling the growing burn from crying too much.  _ Did I make it worse?  _ Bokuto falters. 

“A-akaashi, I’m so—,” but the younger cuts him off. “I love you so much. So much that my tears decided to come out and be the ones to tell you how much I do. Thank you,  _ love _ .” 

Akaashi stands up, taking short strides to sit on the older’s lap as he clings his arms around his neck and buries his face on the crook of it, and no one utters a word. It’s their thing. Odd enough for their teammates to have a sight of Bokuto at peace, but that’s how he really is. He changes drastically when he’s with the younger. 

The next day, Akaashi wakes up in bliss. The morning seems different, it seems as though the sun has risen for him, and only for him. Maybe Bokuto’s cheering up tactic has given him more than what the other expects — a new perspective. 

The way he views things has always been just about how good the others are around him, and him always trying to catch up. Bokuto proves him wrong.  _ Ah, Bokuto.  _ Keiji is in trance as he thinks about the words Bokuto said last night — the way he lets go all of it in such a manner that makes Akaashi’s knees feel weak, the way he said  _ “please keep blazing,”  _ perfectly rolling off his tongue, and just thinking about it makes him shiver every damn time. 

He places his gaze into the blue sky, lips slightly forming a curve. He must really love Bokuto so much to even see him when he’s looking at a clear sky.

_ The sky.  _

It’s a Saturday morning, and his phone vibrates.  _ That must be Bokuto telling me he’s arrived.  _ With that thought, he rushes downstairs where him and his star would meet. 

_ “Let’s go out tomorrow, okay? You have to unwind, love.” Bokuto suggests before they finally went their separate ways.  _

Akaashi runs to the nearest coffee shop. His eyes are searching for an owl-haired man, but to his dismay, no Bokuto appears in his field of sight. He takes the seat beside him as he brings his phone out of his hoodie’s pocket to check the message he didn’t bother reading. He scoffs, “Damn, I was too excited.” 

The message he thought was from Bokuto is actually from his teammate, Konoha. 

_ “Akaashi, come here. Quick. Bokuto needs you.”  _ He stands up tense, his heart beating in an abrupt manner as his mind starts going all over the place. His hunches are almost always right, and he so desperately wishes that this time it’s not. With tears brimming at the corner of his eyes, he pleads.  _ I don’t know what to do without you, Kou. Please be okay.  _

He slams their club room door, scanning everyone until he sees Konoha. “Konoha! Where’s Bokuto?” 

The older only purses his lips, eyes looking straight at Akaashi. “Be strong, okay?” 

Akaashi feels his whole body tremble in fear. The setter is still oblivious as to what is going on with his Koutaro, but with the look on Konoha’s face, he already knows. Whatever it is, it will break him. 

\--

Years passed by, and nothing has changed. Akaashi is still, well, Akaashi. He still looks forward to every sunrise, and waits the whole day to admire the stars above. Above where Bokuto belongs.

The night ends as the sun finally finds its place over the horizon, its golden shaft seeping through Akaashi’s curtains striking directly at his sight. The sunlight is so bright that he had to narrow his gaze to a squint. He sprang out of bed with a jolt, smiling as he gazes over the city gleaming with his favorite morning blaze. Keiji tries to forget when it started, but through its luminous and blinding light, he finds his comfort. The sun, a morning  _ star _ , started off as something he despises. It’s something he used to curse off for waking him up too early for his liking. Keiji tries to forget the day he decided to adore its offensive brightness, but he knows why. Up to this day, he knows exactly why. 

He takes a sip from his morning tea, hands traveling around the couch to find the remote. His hands successfully find it and quickly, he turns on the television. He shifts the channel to sports, lips forming a smile as he sees familiar faces playing against another country. 

_ There he is. Still a star.  _

It’s been years since they broke things off. The devastating news Akaashi received that day was about Bokuto getting an offer from a foreign school. Bokuto declined, though. He said he would never play with any setter other than  _ his  _ Akaashi. It breaks his heart knowing that Bokuto had given up on his dream when he chose to stay with him, but there was nothing he could do. 

They managed to get through the first year, until the older kept getting more offers and the thought of accepting it finally crossed his mind. It made Akaashi happy, of course. He expected him to go back on the court, but Bokuto ended up refusing. Bokuto declined each and every offer he had left until Akaashi decided to give him the biggest push. The push that ate up everything he had in him. 

_ “Kou, listen. You don’t have to keep adjusting yourself to stay beside me, alright? We have different paths in the first place, and you know that.” Akaashi starts off, voice shaking as he masks the pain he’s been suppressing.  _

_ “You don’t have to force yourself to stay on the same lane as I do, Kou. Please go and take yours. You know I would cheer you on, right? I know you well enough to notice the sadness in your eyes whenever you see a volleyball match. I know how much you liked staying on the court. Of all people, I should know how volleyball became a huge part in your life, love. It breaks me seeing you try to ignore the fire, the hunger, the yearning for playing within you. Please, Kou.” Koutaro shakes his head, disagreeing to every word Akaashi had just said. With his firm “no”, Akaashi has made up his mind. _

_ “Then let’s end this.” Akaashi bursts into tears when he sees the pain crossing his star’s face. He hates seeing Bokuto in such a state, but he knows this is the only way he gets to gleam again. _

The game’s MVP gets to have a screen time, and a short interview right after the game. Today, Koutaro gets to have it. 

“Bokuto, you are on fire today! What seems to be the reason behind it?” The interviewer asks as the camera shifts to the owl-haired man with the small beads of sweat trickling down his face making him glow in the most natural way possible. 

“Hey, hey, hey! I have always been on fire, what do you mean today?” Bokuto jokes, hands air-quoting “today”. He chuckles before taking it back.

He cocks his head to the side, taking a deep breath. He smiles back at the camera, looking at it straight and ever so dearly that the memories of the past flashes in Akaashi’s head.  _ That’s how you used to look at me.  _

“Hey, if you’re watching, then you should know that I have always been on fire because of you. I am where I am today because of you. Thank you,  _ my sun. _ ” 

Tears fall down Akaashi’s cheeks, and yet he thinks, 

_ “It was all worth it.”  _


End file.
